Wednesday, July 23, 2008

i can't say it out loud

why do I feel so broken. why is it that I want so badly to just sit here in this space and cry. when it comes down to it, that dream was telling but what if staying is more of a nightmare. it's never just a dream to me, I found that out in fourth grade. it might take time but somehow those dreams that seem so real only take time before they somehow work into my real life. really, I don't know what to do and I need your help. please

Tuesday, July 22, 2008

how true it is

We become what we think about all day long.
Ralph Waldo Emerson

Thursday, July 17, 2008

The reward is great...

I have never felt more rewarded for my very small effort than I do today. I'm not sure I can describe what exactly has happened. It's possibly one of the best feelings in the entire world. There is something about this feeling that is just awesome and it's better that i didn't even have to go out of my way. I love the smile that's on my face and the lightness in my soul.

It's raining outside. I wish that I was outside in my play clothes running around in the rain. There is something so cleansing about standing in the rain with your head turned up at the sky. It's cliche I know, but I miss the carefree days of summer mid day rain.

I'm so excited because today is my last day of work this week. I'm going home tomorrow to see my friends and Mama Mia! I'm so excited.

Lastly, Penny is all grown up, or so it seems. She's off to her college orientation this weekend in Alabama. I can't believe that she's a junior in college. Where did the time go!

Now that you have been subjected to the randomness of my brain, I think I'm going to go work on my quilt for a bit. Until the next time...tootles

Monday, July 14, 2008


To the right and down below my about me you will find a new favorite song. I couldn't just post the lyrics because well, there aren't very many and it would look stupid. It's not just the lyrics anyway it's the whole song. Hopefully it plays on auto play, if not just press play. It's a live version so the spoken part in the middle isn't really part of the song but, it gives it a certain something that I didn't really mind.

P.S. I love you

P.P. S. the whole it's/ its thing still confuses me and I have no idea when or how to use it. I can't really believe that I just admitted that, now I'll have to find out the answer and post a blog just to educate all the confused people like me.

enough of that, enjoy the song.

Thank you Katy! What would I do without your elementary explanation. By the way, my favorite part of the song was replaced by the spoken sad :(

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

the silence of aggravation

Its quite now, I can hear the building creaking and the last drops of water dripping from the roof. Its odd how much a person can think about when there isn't any noise to block out the heart. The list is coming along, it seems like there really isn't enough to do but, then it seems like I can always find fault with the way it feels here. Something is always out of place and there is always something to do. My mind wanders to the wonderful things that have been happening in my life. Also the not so wonderful things. There has been drama, and I am concerned. I haven't thought of a way to get through it, in fact I really think there isn't one. Only to be strong against those who have hate and jealousy in there hearts and minds. Also, I am concerned because my bestie has gone MIA and I can't seem to get back to her. Maybe Mama Mia will bring us back together again. Hopefully! Wandering, wandering, wondering mind I feel all over the place these days, but then the only focus I have at work is ticking off the list and the days until there is someone else to talk to. If ever you wanted to torture a person, give them a list and a space devoid of any communication. I don't remember it being so bad last year, but then it's probably one of those things that I've just erased from my brain. clean shop and one more thing checked off the list!